The Sohma's discover Fanfiction and other stories
by Princess Unicorn123
Summary: The Sohma's discover the weird world of M rated fanfiction. A collective of short oneshots written by the one and only rainbowunicorn123
1. Chapter 1

**Just a oneshot. I remember reading a YukixAyame story and thinking "If Yuki were reading this he'd s**** a brick!" So here it is!**

The Sohma's huddled around the screen horrified."WHAT DID I DO TO MOMIJI!" Kyo shouted eyes bugging out his head. "I'M SO SORRY SHIGURE!" Ritsu apoligized."I AM SO SORRY FOR THIS FOR IT IS SOMEHOW MY FAULT!" Shigure was to busy laughing to reply.

As some of you may have guessed, the Sohma's had discovered fanfiction. At first they laughed about it. They hadn't discovered Yaoi, lemons, limes,yuri and worst of all...incense.

"Oh god no!" Yuki whimpered reading about him and...Ayame!"No, that is just warped!" Shigure giggled loudly as Ayame bent Yuki over and...

Ayame wasn't a bit embarresed by the way. Because he's Ayame of course. Ritsu on the other hand was running about like a madman(woman?) screaming."I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY!" Kyo and Yuki were even more disgusted by the fact half the fanfictions were about them."...and then Kyo kissed Yuki passionatly drawing him closer desprate to feel his warmth...hahahaha!" Shigure read aloud. Yuki and Kyo punched him in union.

"Oh look Hari!" Shigure pointed." Theres one about you and Tohru!I always knew you love-" Hatori glared at him."Shut up." Hiro and Kisa were forced out the room as the content on screen wasn't appropriate for young viewers."Kagura and Rin sitting in a tree, K.I.S.S.I.N.G." Momiji sang happily. Rin looked utterly disgusted. Kagura was hitting Kyo for having (cough) with Yuki.

"If your so disgusted about it." Haru said."Why don't you turn it off." The Sohma's looked at each other and shrugged. Then they stayed on the site for 8 hours.

The moral of the story? Yaoi is addictive.

**A short story based on my adventures in my more adult section of fanfiction. PLEASE REVIEW. **


	2. Hatsuharu and Tohru:Detectives

**2nd oneshot. Please review! **

Hatsuharu and the mysterious case of the vanishing rat.

It was a normal morning in Sohma house. Akito was beating the crap out of some poor soul. Kureno was pretending not to notice. Momiji was high on sugar. And Hiro was dancing. Which, is a bit strange. "What are you doing Hiro?" Haru asked. Hiro smiled. WHAT THE HELL WAS GOING ON! HIROS SMILING! "I'm a ballerina!" He giggled happily twirling. Kisa was trying not to laugh."He's been like this all morning." She said smiling. Haru raised his eyebrows and walked away. As I said before, it was a fairly normal day in Sohma house. Hatsuharu was wandering around looking for something to do. He wandered around the back of the house and saw the strangest thing. Akito was...working out. "Lets get physical, physical!" Akito sang unaware of the staring boy."Let me see your body rock your body rock..." Akito noticed Haru looking through the window."Speak of this to no one." Akito said before turning off the music. Haru nodded and walked away.

So apart from that it was a normal day in the Sohma House. Until Hatori got a phone call."What!?" Hatori said in disbelif."Yuki's been...kidnapped!" Haru 's been kidnapped! Hatsuharu ran out the door and to Shigures house."YUKI'S BEEN KIDNAPPED!" Tohru screamed in Harus face. Haru coughed. "Gee Tohru. Eat a mint." He said wafting the smell away. Tohru ignored him."He didn't come home last night!" Hatsuharu put his hands in his pockets."Sooo..." He said."Want to start a detective agency?" Tohru nodded."Sure. Can I wear a hat?" "If you want."

So Haru and Tohru formed a detective agency."My hat is awesome." Tohru said happily. Haru had a know like Pirot."Yeah, but my moustache is better." Haru said."So we should start by making a list of suspects." Tohru had her thinking face on. It looked like she was constapated."Well...Theres, Momiji, Ayame, Kyo, Harry Styles,Justin Beiber and... the Teletubbies." Haru nodded."Okay. We should start by asking Momiji." Tohru smiled happily."Why are you smiling?" Haru asked. Tohru smiled again."Because I'm not constapated anymore!" "Your gross." Tohru skipped out the room to change her diaper.

"HIYA TOHRU!" Momiji greeted."HI HARU!" Haru glared at him."Drop the cute act Momiji." He snarled."No ones convinced." Momiji smirked."Fine. So why you bothering me." He asked. Tohru tried to act intimidating."Look kid! We know you kidnapped Yuki!" She snarled."Tell us what you did before we have to beat your ass. Please?" She added. Haru shook his head in exasperation."Tohru?" "Yes!" "Shut up." "Shutting." Momiji raised his eyebrows."So Yuki's missing?" He said smirking." And I'm the first suspect. As much as I'd love to help you...I can't. I don't know anything." Haru rolled his eyes."As if. Momiji your a criminal mastermind." He said."You must know something." Momiji looked thoughtful."Maybe...if you make it worth my while." Haru looked around to check no one was looking and pulled out a baggie of...fudge. Momiji's eyes widened."Pure heavan!" He said drooling."FUDGE!" Haru smirked."So we have a deal." Momiji nodded."Fine. Yuki was taking by a Miss Mokoto M." He admitted. Tohru cheered."YAY!" Haru slapped her. "Now please go away. Ritsu! Escort them out." Momiji said snatching the bag out of Harus shoved them out the door with his big manly muscles.

Tohru and Haru sneaked into the school like ninjas. "Ugh...Tohru did you fart!" Haru asked. Tohru smiled."Yep!" Hatsuharu sighed and looked at her in disgust. "I should have get together with Kagura." He muttered. So the two ninjas opened the door to the classroom and pulled out their weapons. Haddock. "MOKOTO PUT THE YUKI DOWN!" Haru shouted. Mokoto was chasing Yuki about the room trying to kiss him."Hey Yuki!" Tohru waved. Mokoto attacked Tohru with her weapon. A Donut. "NOOOO!" Tohru screamed."I've been hit!" Haru hit Mokoto over the head with a chair."Penguins." Mokoto murmered before falling knelt besides Tohru and cried."Don't leave me Tohru!" He wept."You can't die!" Tohru smiled weakly and coughed up blood."Yuki...I..I..like apples." Then she died.

Tohrus funeral was very sad. Arisa went on a killing spree and Hanajima went a bit crazy and started eating mud. Yuki was crying over Tohrus coffin. 2 minutes later he was fine again. And everyone lived happily ever after. Acept for Tohru.

**DEATH BY DONUT! I got the idea off Smosh Food Battle!**


	3. Shigure Gets Fanfiction

**Hiya! I'm on a roll today! So I will crack on with my fabulous story shall I?**

**Shigure Gets Fanfiction!**

Tohru looked along the list of storys. Tohru had been reading fanfiction for the past couple of weeks and found she was really enjoying this! She was about to go and work on her own story when one caught her eye.

_Yuki loves Tohru by SHIGUREsohma_

Tohru froze and went pale. Shigure was writing FANFICTION!

**Meanwhile in Shigures office...**

_"Tohru, I love you!" Yuki announced dramatically. Tohru shook her head."Alas my dear Yuki! I am in love with another!" Momiji skipped up to them and grabbed Tohru's hand."No! Not him!" Yuki said. Tohru shrugged."Yuki he's a sex bunny!" She said. Yuki cried."WHY WHY WHY!" Tohru looked at him sympathetically."Oh Yuki! Find Kyo, Yuki! He is your one true love!" Then she skipped off into the sunset with Momiji and they had lots of little baby bunnies called Steve(even the girls)_

_"I must find Kyo!" Yuki realized."For I love him!" Romantic music starts playing."Kyo, I realized that you, are my one true love!" Kyo looked at him strangly."Go away rat boy! I'm with Ayame now!" Yuki wailed in despare."WHHHYYYY!" He screamed. "Hey! Get a grip! Why don't you go find Haru?" Kyo snarled. Yuki got up and ran to find Hatsuharu. He burst into his room."HARU I LOV-" Yuki stopped when he saw Haru kissing Ritsu."I hate my life." Yuki said and walked away to go eat a barrel of ice cream._

Shigure cackled evily at his own genius.

**Meanwhile in Yuki's room**

Yuki finished reading the fanfiction. Calmly he walked over to the phone and dialled Ritsu's number."Hello?" Ritsu said picking up the phone. Yuki took a deep breath."DAMN YOU RITSU!" He screamed.

"I'M SORRY!"

**Meanwhile in Kyo's room**

"Shut up!" He shouted." God can't anyone get some peace and quiet!" Kyo went on typing.

_"Ayame! I cannot go through with this! It feels so wrong!" Yuki protested. Ayame held Yuki tighter."How can something so wrong feel so right!" He said kissing Yuki passionetly. Then they had hot, wild, incest sex. _

_THE END_

Kyo grinned."Revenge!" He said happily.

**Meanwhile in Ayame's shop.**

"Ah look another story about me!" He bellowed." I am so wonderful!" He clicked on the story. _Brotherly Love! by kyo_is_awesome456_

5 minutes later...

"Oh my! It seems even Yuki can't resist my masculine charms!" He said pompously.

**Meanwhile in Kagura's room.**

_"And do you take Kagura Sohma to be your lawfully wedded bride?" The vicar asked. Kyo nodded."I do." The vicar smiled."You may now kiss the bride!" Kyo and Kagura kissed and the whole church cheered. Except Tohru. She was crying into her dress. She was such a sweet girl really. Pity about her massive, green spotted face!_

Kagura sighed. "One day...one day!" She said dreamily.

**Meanwhile in Akito's room**

_Tohru begged for mercy as Akito rained down punches again and again. She was weak. Pathetic. And now she was dead._

Akito sighed."One day...one day!" He/she said dreamily.

**Meanwhile in Rainbowunicorn123 room.**

"I'm bored. I know I'll torture the Fruits Basket cast!" She said brightly.

**I hope you like!**


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